How I almost talked myself out of the role of a lifetime
by walking into the room & comparing myself to others
I walked into an audition & all my competition was in the room. Of course, I immediately started to doubt I'd get the part.
So, I started listening to other peoples' auditions & noticed they were making acting choices based on what they thought the writer/director/producer wanted, so they all started sounding alike & pat.
And I thought:
Why was I called in for this role, I'm all wrong? The breakdown said they were looking for a big 1940's, cigar-smoking, Shelly Winters madam. But then, I thought, no, I wasn't called in because of my body, I was called in for what I know how to do emotionally:
I know how to put someone on the spot, shamelessly look a man over for spare parts, make him do my bidding whether he likes it or not; to use my sensuality in a ferocious way that brokers no argument. Yeah, I played a 5'3" Medea where I destroyed a 6'4" Jason. It wasn't the body, but rather the size of my spirit that got me that part & this audition. This CD saw me. That's why they called me in for this role.
I'm saying this in my head, so that I remember that I got this audition because they want something that only I have: my emotional chord of audacious self-regard is at work here.
So instead of making the obvious choice, I made the choice that fit me. Because really, people are hiring me. Not the character.
So, I went in the room,
played it much smaller,
subtle & smokey.
It was a risky choice, but since it was true to me, the audition sang. They were surprised by my choice, but they laughed their asses off & gave my manager amazing feedback.
Two weeks later, I was sewed into a vinyl dress on the set of Gotham running a huge BDSM club, dressing down the detective who thought he could intimidate me. As we worked the scene, the director kept yelling over the smoke and music:
OK, Sal, take him out, dress him down, show him who's boss. Own his little ass!
and I did!
That's how you walk into a room,
see the competition & not falter.
Because you're there to offer up your UNIQUE goods.
You GOT the audition because you have something in your emotional arsenal that knows this character's SoulSong.
Something unique to you that only you will bring to this character & often, you'll make them
re-envision the role
because of YOU.
You walk in with YOU.YOU WALK IN WITH THE DEEPEST UNDERSTANDING OF YOUR EMOTIONAL CHORDS.
Your unique set of life lessons that you have mastered that make you uniquely qualified to tell a story about this person's journey through the lease of your emotional chord.
That's how you deal with that competition fear.
You walk in with a super clear understanding of the center of your emotional range. For me, my emotional chord of An audacious Self Regard is one of my go to ways to enter into a role. It is a deep understanding of my core that has taken a long time to master and lots of internal work to nurture and grow this emotional chord.
So, when taking on a role, instead of looking to please people by giving them what you think they want, you make choices that have to do with what you know you do well emotionally. The emotional types that resonate with you.
Because those you can do
at the drop of hat,
with your eyes closed.
When you lead with the deepest psychological understanding of who you are, what you've learned & your purpose, you become unforgettable on set and in the audition room. You lead with who you are and you bring all of that to bear in the audition.
The problem is if you don't know your emotional types. And everyone has about 4 major emotional chords which when applied to an audition or role, it becomes easy to create behavior based on your most authentic emotional self.
Then you won't make choices that have to do with what you think the director wants. And people smell that unsexy uncertainty.
It feels needy & the last thing people want on a set is someone who needs their hands held to do the work fast, clearly & on cue every single take.
Because all of that personal work is the underbelly of what you walk into the audition room with; it is also what gets you representation, the audition, the ability to get CDs on your team because they feel like they know you, your spirit.
Are you ready to learn how to apply this technique to creating a character
on set or preparing sides you have no idea what to do with?
Love, Light, Power & AllThatGoddessShit,
Tony-winning Producer, Actor, Writer
& TheDreamUnLocked CEO
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